My wife was very angry, I got banned from Walmart and I didn’t tell her why. Well, she found out after they wrote a letter to her…
Dear Mrs Smith,
Over the past year, your husband has caused quite a disturbance in our store. We cannot allow this type of behaviour and we have had to ban him from the store. We have received many complaints regarding your husband Mr. Smith, below is a list of just a few:
- January 11: Set all the alarm clocks in the electronics isle to go off every 5 minutes.
- February 9: He took 12 boxes of condoms and put them in other people’s carts when they wasn’t looking.
- March 4: He poured tomato sauce on the floor and made a trail to the womans toilets.
- April 4: Went to Customer Services and tried to reserve a pack of tampax.
- May 15: Went to the camping department, sat in a tent and asked children to come in as long as they bring bedding from the home department – there was more then 20 children who obliged.
- June 3: He ran around the store like a crazed man humming the Mission Impossible theme tune.
- July 7: He was Hidden in the clothing racks and when people was looking through, he would yell “Pick me! Pick me!”
- August 23: Went to the checkout with a box of condoms and asked the member of staff where the fitting room was.
- Semptember 2: He went to into the fitting rooms, sat in there for a while and then started shouting “There is no toilet paper in here!”
- October 7: Parked his van in the trolley shelter.
- December 29: This was the final straw, he positioned manikins in the clothing department in sexually explicit poses!
Mr. Mike Hunt, Store Manager